"It’s too quiet. Just do it." "I can’t." I shake my head, looking back at the tower of books. "They’ll make me leave."
"You know you can. Just plant your feet and push-" The shelves look down, and almost imperceptibly shimmy a little.
"I can’t do it on my own. I’m too heavy with all these stories-"
"I can’t do it. No, I won’t." I move to walk away, closing my eyes to shut out its cajoling voice.
"Then- just climb to the top. Where you put your money- you can do that can’t you? You’re going to have to anyway- do it now-" It wobbles treacherously again and 101 Tales of Irish Horror falls from somewhere near the top. It pleads and goads me to turn around, to send it crashing down with all the rest of the shelves like a string of wordy dominoes, to bring about its destruction and that of all its kind. To give myself away and destroy my refuge.
I don’t know if its the prompt or me, but this is terrible. I’m distracted, I can’t seem to focus my thoughts. Thinking about the money hidden in the carved out space inside a book on the top shelf. More money, than I think I’ve ever had. I’ve been saving it. Not paying for my way into clubs, risking lifting a little more from this guy, or that trick. Cutting back on buying party favors, not carrying drugs with me, only using what I lift. Not. Spending. Money. It’s almost enough. I think. The money is wrapped up with a newspaper ad for a motorcycle, that I can afford. I just need money for gas, and the rest, as the immortal They are so fond of saying, is history.
I've left this one mostly intact, without cutting the prompt out of it. This was about the time that I had decided I wanted to leave Chicago and maybe go to California, of somewhere warm. I had been saving up cash as well as a junkie can by hiding it from myself on top of a shelf in a public library. I used to spend a lot of time reading in libraries, because they're warm booky places. My plan was to save up money for a motorcycle, something I could fuel up easily and travel light for as long as possible.
... I did finally make it to Oregon. It just took me about five years.